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Mediation that can help the get crisis

Mediation that can help the get crisis

Orthodox Jews in Chicago who want to be recognized as divorced by the Jewish community must rely on acquiring a "get," which is granted at the sole discretion of the husband. However, many women may wait months and years for the get. The number of women waiting for a get is on the rise. This has caused some women to suffer financially or give up custody in order for the husband to agree to a get. Mediation may be able to help some couples execute a collaborative divorce that also provides a get. It serves as an alternative from the court system and rabbinical courts.

One orthodox Jewish woman pursued a divorce and was still waiting for a get two years later. Without a get, the woman was not allowed to date or remarry in her community. She turned to the Jewish rabbinical courts. This relies on a system of public shaming to pressure husbands who do not want to give the get. She sent out letters to all of her wedding guests and asked them to similarly pressure her ex-husband and his family into giving her the get. The process also involves informing synagogues and schools of the situation.

Mediation gives spouses an alternative setting than the high-tension courtroom. It also gives spouses the opportunity to voice their concerns and work through important issues. Because it is not dependent on a court ruling, mediation can provide creative solutions to problems. Courts often use objective formulas and orders that do not take the parties' real issues and situations into consideration. Mediation lets spouses focus on agreements that revolve around the intricate details of their life, which may lessen the proclivity to withhold a get.

Individuals who are getting divorced may consider mediation. This may provide a forum for the spouses to work out an amicable agreement.

Source: The Huffington Post, "5 Ways That Divorce Mediation Can Help Resolve the 'Get' Crisis ", Morghan Leia Richardson, January 06, 2014

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